Wednesday, April 15

Psalm 46

I have the most incredible set of friends. Not only are they supremely interesting people, but they are totally unique, and they seem to give me the freedom to be myself without the pressure to always understand what that means; but maybe my favorite of all...they are deeply spiritual and incredibly strong women.

The Girlfriends challenged each other to do a devotional on Psalm 46 - just reading & meditating on it with God & then share our thoughts with each other via email. While we may stink at being on time, it was worth the wait. Our culture would be a very different place if every person had even just one friend who had the guts to share with them the intimate thoughts that pass between themselves & God. Christian or not, it is impossible to rub elbows with people who are in touch with God and not be compelled to be a better version of yourself.

I can't claim any special connection with God that goes beyond what anyone else is offered & therefore I don't presume to speak on His behalf or contain wise words of wisdom that you should hear. However, in reading Psalm 46 from The Message, I was struck by the following...

God lives here, the streets are safe. River fountains splash joy, cooling God's city: this sacred haunt of the Most High.

While I am no theologian, and while I may be taking these verses out of their intended context, I am still struck at the prospect of me being that fountain - the way in which He splashes joy on the Earth - refreshing & comforting those in His proximity. If the Earth is God's creation, and the city of God is the church, let me be the fountain that gives life & breath to the weary and let my affects spur others on to do the same - making the church spill out onto the community, blessing everyone it touches.

I heard a story once of a woman (and I honestly don't care if it's true or not) who wanted to be buried with a fork in her hand. The story says her reason was that she always got excited when someone cleared her plate for her & told her to keep her fork - that held the promise of dessert! She saw heaven as dessert & wanted to be buried with her fork as a reminder to those at her funeral that there was much more to be excited about than there was to mourn. Whenever I think of my own funeral, I think of this story because it reflects my heart so perfectly. As of today, there will be a second thing that will come to mind whenever I consider my own funeral...I pray that at the culmination of everything, the theme of people's words of remembrance about me will be that I 'splashed joy' on them.

Wednesday, April 8

It Only Takes a Spark

There is really nothing cooler in this world than knowing you're making a difference. Heck, it might be an indirect difference about 12-times-removed, but when you know - I mean really KNOW - that what you're doing is having an impact, nothing equals it.

I've just walked in the door from my 2nd 12 hour day in a row. Last week I had a 12 hour day & a 15 hour day. I've pulled several all nighters in the past couple of months. My work/life balance is completely out of control (it's also under review & plans are being made to fix it), but I'm sitting down for a reheated dinner at nearly 10 pm with a sense of 'fullness' because I'm one person in a world of billions and what I do matters.

I'm no Billy Graham & certainly no Mother Teresa, but I am Angela Stewart and while maybe I sat in a discussion tonight & 'changed' the world instead of preached to a crowd of thousands to change the world, I'm one piece in a puzzle that's making a ripple. After all, isn't that what Mother Teresa did? Mopped one brow, fed one orphan, comforted one mortal...but you put it together & something is created exponentially larger than the sum of it's parts. Something that lasts well beyond any single lifespan. Not just a legacy or a memory cherished by those it directly impacts...but a living organism that carries on & builds momentum long after its original spark is 'gone'.

I. Am. That. Spark.

I rest my head on the pillow tonight with a happy exhaustion that can only come from being fulfilled in what I do. And isn't that sort of true for everyone - we feel best about ourselves when we know what we're doing MATTERS?